As a collective, we fear public speaking more than death. Isn’t that crazy? And yet, public speaking is such an effective way to promote what you do, share your knowledge and passion and reach so many more people with your message.
There is so much information out there about public speaking, which can be overwhelming. Rather choose someone you click with, or who inspires you, and learn from them. You can do their course, get some coaching from them, or you can just watch them, and pick up their ‘best practice’.
Here are some of my top tips for learning how to stand up and address a group of people, with confidence:
One: Blank faces & yawns
When you look out at your audience and you see blank faces, it’s absolutely NOT about YOU. People have busy lives and may be thinking about what they are cooking for dinner or are concerned about a project at work.
When someone in your audience yawns, they are most probably simply tired. They may have been up all night with a sick child, or have had a long, and busy week. And some people want to just be passive listeners. It may be the first time they have sat still for a long time.
Do not take blank faces or yawns as something you have done, but rather accept that people have other things going on in their lives.
Two: People are not interested in you
I know this sounds completely nuts, but if you take a step back, you will see that they are only interested in what you have got to say. They want to learn from you, be inspired or see something from another perspective. They have come into the room, or signed up for the talk, not because of YOU, but because the topic has resonated with them.
Focus on your content and not on the other ‘stuff’ around how you look, what you are wearing or if you think you “aren’t very good at public speaking”.
You are not being judged! Your audience wants to enjoy you and your content.
Three: The brain remembers negativity
This is all about how we are wired for survival. We recall negative feelings in order to survive. You have to be strong and focused to rid the brain of these negative thoughts and invite positivity back into our headspace. You may want to do with using meditation or repeating a powerful mantra. Find the way that works best for you.
By bringing your brain into the present moment, you are making sure it can’t dwell on the negativity it remembers from the past.
Four: The audience can’t see your nerves
You may think your voice is shaking, your brow is damp and your eyes are wide. But the audience cannot see this. It may feel like it is obvious to you, and so the audience must have noticed it too.
If you do stumble because of nerves, the most your audience will think is:
“He / she is so brave to be up there. I could never do it!”
Don’t dwell in fear. It will paralyse you!
Five: Allow for pauses to breathe
Pauses:
- Give you time to gather your thoughts or check your notes
- Allow the audience time to absorb what you have said
- Prepare your audience for the next lot of content
- Help you slow the pace if you are nervous
- Are incredibly powerful to add impact
Pauses are your most valuable tool which allow you to feel the space to feel connected.
Six: Talk to one person at a time
When you make eye contact with one person at a time, you are delivering your message with clarity and impact. You don’t want to look vaguely across the room does or focus on your PowerPoint presentation.
Make a point of connecting to one person as a time and your audience will love you!
Remember, you talk is a conversation, not performance.
Seven: Accept applause
It is so easy to applause others, but when it comes to accepting appreciation from others, we find it really very difficult. Why do we seem to expect negative responses?
Graciously accept the applause and feel proud of what you have done!
Eight: You don’t have to be perfect
No one expects you to be perfect. Only you do! Your audience wants you to be authentically YOU and share your message with passion and insight. There is no such thing as a perfect talk, so striving for perfection, and comparing yourself to others, means you will forever be disappointed.
Relax and have fun getting your message across! And look for any opportunity to deliver a talk no matter how long of short. The more you do it, the better you will feel about public speaking.
Check out a piece I wrote: Be. Believe. Breathe on Meaning 4 Life.
